Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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