If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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