Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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