I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
