you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
