Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
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