she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
