I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
He passed out mid-signature
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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