no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
