she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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