We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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