Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
