Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
