We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
