she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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