it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize