yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
