i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Randomize
