69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I want to fling myself into the sun
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
as a side note pls kill me
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
