You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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