hell yes lets make some ravioli
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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