What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Randomize
