she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize