I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
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