I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
