Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
