Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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