my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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