First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
My Sexting was not on an AP level
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
