I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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