Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
