I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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