I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Randomize
