So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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