What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
