Whod you bang
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
