So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
