If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Just puked most of my soul out..
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
