so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
