it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i barfeds in our rink
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
