You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
