hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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