just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Randomize
