They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize