Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
