You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
im six kinds of drunk right now
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize