I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
She swung at the pinata with crutches
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
