I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
There's even glitter on my cock...
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
