I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
