He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
